Thursday, February 21, 2008

Please Don't Squeeze the Charmin!


I don't think I am one of those people who ask for a lot in general. I don't even buy the really expensive toilet paper because, you know, toilet paper doesn't really have to be the highest quality, right?

Well, I think my view of cheap toilet paper has changed. For the past few weeks, I have noticed that the quality of toilet paper at work has really gone down hill. It has weird red and blue flecks of something in it and I swear I saw a tiny piece of wood or cardboard or god knows what sticking out of the roll. Even after discovering this I continued to use it (I mean, what was I really going to do at this point?) So I guess I am asking, why do I have to use toilet paper that scares me and could possibly hurt me?

I know there are way bigger problems in the world than my toilet paper situation. When I visited Egypt toilet paper was scarce (I had to carry my own around or pay for it) so I guess the toilet paper in my office would be like gold over there, so, I should try to put things into perspective.

On the way back from lunch, I stopped by CVS and bought some toilet paper for the office. It's the least I could do really. If I can save at least one person from getting a splinter down south, I will have done my job today.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Wiping your ass and other parts of your body is an important issue.
I am a big fan of baby wipes, and I don't give a shit who knows about it.
In fact, I am proud, because I have a cleaner ass than those who don't use baby wipes.

The process should be:

1. Use toilet paper to clean as much as you can.

2. Use a baby wipe to further the cleaning process until your ass is totally clean.

3. Follow up with more toilet paper to make sure you don't leave your ass moist; this is something that will cause problems.

Thank you,

Gary Sause
Musical Director of Music.